9 ways escorts are like sex therapists – and 5 ways they aren’t

Sex therapy is a recognized specialization wherein trained professionals help individuals overcome mental and physical issues causing sexual problems. Many people who suffer from sexually-related issues are against pursuing formalized therapy to find resolutions for their problems. Some of these affected individuals turn to escorts for solutions.

Whether they need someone to ease them through sexual situations or to simply talk to about fears or concerns about sex, clients find that escorts are much like sex therapists, when they need them to be.

There really are several similarities between escorts and sex therapists. Here are the most significant likenesses:

  1. Both professionals charge clients for their time. Sex therapists typically see several clients per day (much like escorts do), and they spend at least 50 minutes with them. (The other 10 minutes of the hour is spent prepping for an appointment or making notes about the previous experience with the client.) Escorts book encounters with clients ahead of time, just like sex therapists do, and inquire about their major concerns before meeting up, in order to be prepared ahead of time. Therapists ask clients to fill them in about their concerns ahead of time, so they can prepare, too. Escorts usually have a one- or two-hour minimum, much like therapists do.
  2. Escorts and sex therapists may work independently or with another group of professionals. It’s common for escorts to work on their own or for an agency. A sex therapist may have a private practice or counsel clients through a clinical setting with other professionals. When an escort or therapist works independently, they may set up their own appointments and coordinate their own marketing. However, when either of these professionals work with others, the scheduling, marketing and billing is often a separate affair.
  3. Incall or outcall, it doesn’t matter. Escorts and therapists work from either location. Escorts typically call encounters they travel to outcalls; therapists often use the term onsite when they visit a client in surroundings other than their offices. Therapists set guidelines as to where they are willing to visit with patients at, just as escorts do. (Escorts don’t usually travel to sketchy neighborhoods, personal homes or undetermined locations.) When therapists visit with clients in their own spaces, it’s usually within an office setting. Their offices may be quite casual or formal. They vary greatly, based on the therapist. Escorts’ incall locations vary, too, with the decor set by the escort’s personality and escort image.
  4. Both professionals may address specific sexual concerns. Many escorts have been contacted to help a client get past a sex phobia, learn a new technique or to enhance arousal. Sex therapists address these same concerns, too. Clients of either type of professional usually set forth a goal to achieve as a result of the visits, which directly correlates to overcoming an issue through finding a solution. The ways in which an escort and therapist may approach a client’s problem may be similar: they talk to the client as much as possible about the issue, exploring any deep-set issues in order to avoid adverse reactions in the client.
  5. Escorts and sex therapists are extremely comfortable discussing deeply intimate and overtly sexual topics. There often isn’t room to be shy or naive when working to help a client overcome a problem related to his sex life. All details, regardless of how gritty or intimate, are significant to helping a client work through his issues. All categories of sex are possibly on the table for discussion, from typical heterosexual intercourse to fetish desires to crazy fantasies. All are up for conversation, depending on the client. Neither professional can shy away from sex talk and must be comfortable using not only “proper” terms, but slang or urban talk, too. Escorts and sex therapists must also be informed about a variety of sexual issues in order to be comfortable talking about issues with clients.
  6. Sex therapists and escorts must possess excellent communication skills. Both professionals must be blessed with the gift of gab. Small talk and basic conversational abilities will go far in opening the door for clients to bare their souls, confiding their deepest, darkest secrets and fears to their professional of choice. However, beyond basic communication skills, both escorts and sex therapists must be able to draw out a client, knowing when they’ve asked too much and sensing when there is more to learn. They must be excellent at encouragement when a client opens up to share. Part of their communication skills must be the ability to listen. Listening is not just about hearing what a client is saying, it’s comprehending and applying their thoughts and feelings to applications that can help the client.
  7. Professionals dealing with sex must have open minds. Being judgmental has no place when working with clients who have sexual dysfunctions, fears or other issues. Because clients may have wide ranges of experiences, their stories can be shocking and surprising. Some clients may have been involved in extremely deviant behavior. Others may have contributed to depraved acts. Regardless of their previous actions, all clients deserve to be heard in order to overcome their problems. Escorts who judge clients for their requests often find their client lists dwindling, just as sex therapists do who fail to keep an open mind when discussing client issues.
  8. Escorts and sex therapists network with other professionals for the good of their clients. Often, sex therapists obtain clients through referrals from other therapists. General psychologists and the sort may refer a client with specific sexually-related problems to a sex therapist so specific issues can be directly addressed. Escorts often receive referrals from other escorts or agencies when a client comes along who is a perfect fit for them. Additionally, if a extra help is needed in order to solve a client’s problem, an escort may send a client to another escort who can better help him. For instance, if a client is experiencing problems associated with his need for affection and intimacy, rather than simple sex, an escort may refer her client to another escort whose specialty is the Girlfriend Experience. Sex therapists often do the same thing, in a way. If impotency is a problem for a client, physical issues may be addressed by referring the client to a physician who can check a client’s medicines or other health for reasons associated with the inability to perform.
  9. Discretion is key in both lines of work. It’s common knowledge in the escort industry that escorts are highly discreet about their client lists and what occurs during encounters. Escorts need it to be this way for several reasons: their own privacy, the privacy of their clients and steering clear of law enforcement, as examples. Sex therapists also keep their sessions and clients confidential. The federally-mandated Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act creates laws requiring that therapists and other health care professionals must protect their clients’ identities and case notes. The laws indicate that all diagnoses and other information related to patients are to be private. Even without the laws in place, it’s important that sex therapists promise non-disclosure in order to gain the trust of clients so they can help them solve their problems. Privacy and discretion are paramount in both professions.

While both professionals maintain many similarities to one another, there are definite differences, too. Even though both escorts and sex therapists work to help clients find resolutions to their sexual problems, sex therapists work in a much different manner. Here is a closer look at some of the things that set true sex therapists apart from escorts:

  1. Education is required. Sex therapists must obtain a graduate degree in a mental health field (social work, psychology, professional counseling, family and marriage therapy, etc.) from an accredited college or university. Many sex therapists earn a doctoral degree, in addition to completing required sex-related education provided by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT). Additional training includes: 90 hours human sexuality; 60 hours sex therapy; 10 hours Sexual Attitude Reassessment seminar; 50 hours sex therapy sessions. Through their training, they obtain a higher awareness of sexuality that rises about opinion or personal experience. Knowing how the brain affects sex and the body through science, sex therapists are prepared to address all issues of sexual problems.
  2. Sex therapists never allow physical contact between themselves and their clients. Unlike escorts whose encounters are based on physical intimacy with their clients, sex therapists abstain from engaging in any intimate situations with clients. The kind of therapy they provide is simply through discussion and exploring one’s emotions, fears and memories. Talk therapy provides clients an opportunity to verbally explore their problems and implement solutions later with their partners. In fact, most medical ethics guidelines prohibit the physical contact between a sex therapist and her patients. However, sexual surrogates (not to be confused with sex therapists) readily engage in intimate acts with their clients.
  3. Rarely do sex therapists engage in any kind of refreshments or alcohol with clients. Sex therapy sessions are based on a more formal relationship that doesn’t include sharing a meal or a glass of wine. Therapy sessions are conducted sober, without the influence of alcohol. (Escorts may often indulge in a bottle of wine with a client or eat dinner during an encounter.) Sex therapists are purely there for conversation…not companionship. Their appointments with clients are not to make them feel like they are friends, but they are intended to address a client’s sexual issues.
  4. Insurance may cover sex therapy. Probably, a lot of clients wish their insurance would cover their encounters with escorts, but it doesn’t work that way. If clients are diagnosed with issues that a licensed therapist may be able to help with, most insurances that cover the costs of mental health care will pay (or partially pay) for appointments to resolve problems. Of course, paperwork and bureaucratic red tape are part of this process, but it can seriously offset the costs associated with therapy.
  5. Sex therapists are there for serious issues. Escort encounters are for fun and excitement, in addition to helping a client get through uncomfortable issues. However, a sex therapist is there to help a client with problems that need addressed with serious solutions. It’s not about pillow fights or getting a massage. A therapy session with a licensed sex therapist is sometimes hard and requires a client to focus inwardly, when that’s sometimes painful and awkward.