Society’s overall perceptions of escorts include the image of a drug-addled, runaway who performs sex acts for money. People seem to think they lack values and morals and have low personal opinions of themselves.
Far and wide, rscorts are intelligent, beautiful, entrepreneurs who rely on their skills and talents to provide companionship for those who seek it in exchange for generous compensation. However, just like all other slices of the world population, many ARE plagued by addictions and problems that are exacerbated by their careers.
Escorts with addictions tend to indulge in their cravings and further enable their habits. Despite efforts not to, addicts crave the object of their addictions, lose control over its use and continue their involvement with these habits, despite negative consequences. Contrary to simple thought, addictions don’t have to include just drug and alcohol abuse. Many escorts may suffer from substance abuse addictions, but others may be victims of gambling, sex or food addictions, for example.
Research and neuroimaging technology indicate that pleasure-associated addictions cause similar changes in the brain that substance abuse ones can.
As over 23 million Americans are addicted to alcohol and drugs, it is possible that some escorts have problems with these issues, in addition to other negative habits.
Consider these addictions and how they are affected by your escorting career:
- Alcohol and other drugs: It’s pretty common for escorts to feel the need, especially as they start their careers, to use a glass or two of wine or a joint (if they’re into that type of thing) to settle their nerves as they prepare to go out for an encounter. They are nervous and uptight about what they’re getting ready to do, so they use substances to numb them a bit or loosen them up so they can be more “fun.” What starts out as something fairly innocent may get out of hand when it becomes a necessity to do it prior to every encounter. Additionally, many escorts soothe their emotions about an encounter gone wrong with a bottle of wine or a few drinks of hard liquor. When these actions become habitual, it’s hard to break free from them, especially when the triggers are constant with your career. Even more temptation occurs when clients want you to indulge with them as a way to take the edge off or as a social part of the encounter. And, some clients are heavy drinkers (or drug users) and like a party girl escort who can enjoy their type of “a good time.” Resisting these temptations is difficult. It’s best to avoid them altogether if you think you may have a problem. While it may deter some clients, it’s best for you in the long run. Clearly state in your profile that you don’t do drugs or drink with clients…ever. Indicate that it’s a prohibited activity, so it’s not even an issue when you actually meet up.
- Shopping: Some escorts’ shopping urges are indulged by clients who like to buy their providers nice things. Some clients really enjoy a good shopping trip, followed by your grateful appreciation that ensues afterward. Shopping addictions for escorts are often made worse by the constant need to update your escort wardrobe. Frequently, you need to purchase new clothing to wear to and from encounters, in order to fit in with where you may be meeting up with clients. And, you also have to go shopping for sexy lingerie to wear with them, too. Clients tire of seeing the same bra and panty set every time, so you need several selections. Often, escorts have to go shopping to meet client requests for specific outfits or underwear choices. And, escorts may attempt to smooth over uncomfortable emotions they have about escorting by going shopping. Making those purchases and adding them to your wardrobe may make you temporarily happy, much like a drug high creates euphoria for a junkie. There are a couple of ways that you can deal with this type of an addiction as an escort. The first is to just stop shopping for anything. If your clients request a certain outfit, deny their request if it isn’t already in your closet. Don’t run out and buy it. Just say no. And, secondly, don’t allow your clients to take you shopping or give you gift cards to your favorite boutiques. Suggest to the client that he pick something out for you, so you don’t tempt yourself into stepping over reasonable shopping lines.
- Gambling: Escorts who have sudden large sums of money on their hands aren’t always guaranteed to be good savers. It’s easy to go a little crazy when you have some big dough in your pocket. And, it’s very tempting to use those big amounts of cash to have some fun. If escorts live close to gambling establishments, it can be a way to get away from the stresses of your career. Casinos are usually open 24 hours per day, which makes it convenient to go there during the odd hours that you may be awake or have free. There aren’t a lot of other places open at 3am when you get done with encounters. You may not be ready to go home and go to bed, so heading to the casino for a bit of stress reduction sounds good. However, when betting gets out of hand and you have to try “just one more hand” while sitting at the poker table, it’s becoming a problem. Also, some escorts incur dry spells in their income periods, which cause them to resort to drastic measures to pay the bills. It’s not uncommon for an escort to attempt to double her money at the roulette table. The best thing that escorts can do when gambling is their problem is to stay out of the casinos. Perhaps, changing your working hours so that you’re inclined to visit other establishments that are open during more traditional hours will give you other options for entertainment. Also, make a financial plan and stick to it. Reward yourself with other things when you save a certain amount: a new bag or an evening at the movies.
- Sex: Sex addiction is a pretty serious problem if you’re an escort. While you may have developed your addiction through your career, it also continues to feed your cravings. It’s difficult to avoid the “thrill” when you’re actively engaging in intimate activities with clients on a consistent basis. With each additional illicit encounter, your habits are intensified and it takes more to satisfy you. Many sex addicted escorts find themselves looking for hook-ups outside of the escort/client relationship or current personal situations in order to fulfill their needs. Losing control and seeking sex in unsafe situations or engaging in unwise behaviors (lack of condom use) are usual symptoms that an escort may have problems. While you can’t really avoid intimacy when you’re an escort, you can limit the way encounters occur and how the intimacy is conducted during your sessions. Begin trying to focus on personal connections, instead of just the physical act of sex when you’re with clients. It might be possible to take a break from escorting for a few weeks, too, to help get your habits back in a healthy place.
- Food: Food is a big deal to escorts, especially when they are trying to maintain the “perfect” weight for escorting. And, the more you deny yourself something, the more you may want it. Many escorts develop eating disorders, including bulimia where they binge eat (anything and everything available) and then purge it back out (force themselves to vomit it up) to avoid gaining weight and avoid the guilt of eating so much. Escorts may be eating to soothe emotions they are dealing with associated with the choice to escort or with other feelings they have had hurt due to mean-spirited clients. This can become a huge problem, as it causes weight gain and unhealthy habits that will cause other medical problems down the road. Sometimes, escorts get addicted to food, because they are bored. They work weird hours as an escort and fill their time when they’re not with clients or marketing themselves indulging in tasty treats. You can eliminate this problem by finding other healthy habits to engage in such as exercise, reading, gardening or volunteering in the community. Finally, some clients enable food addictions by constantly feeding their providers. They may bring in gourmet delectables that are irresistible and cause an escort to associate pleasure and food. When this starts to happen for you, learn to turn down the offerings your client comes armed with during encounters. Feeding you does not have to be part of the services that you allow.
- Work: Being a workaholic is just as bad as being too lazy. Some escorts discover that they can make amazing money through working in the adult entertainment industry as a companion. As they make more money, they desire more success, which compels them to work more and harder. While nothing can be said for hard work, it becomes a problem when an escort places her career and work habits above her family members and friends all of the time. It’s easy for escorts to do this, especially when they receive constant praise, affection and appreciation from clients. They may crave this affirmation, which makes them want to work even more. To avoid these urges, you’ve got to schedule in some time for fun and relaxation. Not only do you risk your relationships by working too much, but you will burn yourself out and start performing poorly in your career, too. Taking time off is just as important as convincing yourself that you need to work hard. The money is great that you make through being an escort, but it can’t consume your thoughts and desires fully.
- Plastic surgery: Escorting is a hard gig, where you are always striving to become your clients’ ideal woman. Often, client’s desires can leave an escort feeling pretty bad about herself, if she starts out with low self-perceptions. Clients always want fuller bustlines, more generous booties, smaller waistlines or other attributes that are difficult to achieve from diet and exercise alone. (And, they may take too long to get the old-fashioned way!) Many escorts use their profits from their career to polish themselves up with some plastic surgery. However, once you go under the knife, it’s much easier to repeat it a second time, and a third, and so on. Many women suffer from body dysmorphic disorder, which creates desires to undergo procedures that will help morph them into the “perfect” image of what a woman should look like. They are 15 times more likely to undergo repeated cosmetic procedures, according to the American Academy of Cosmetic Surgery. Escorts need to learn to love their bodies as they are and pay attention to clients who really love the image they see when they open the door to a beautiful escort. Refusing to let criticism get to them and accepting themselves is the first key. Escorts who feel they suffer from this should strike critical clients from their lists and only visit with the ones who make them feel positive about their appearances.
- Risky behaviors: Adrenaline junkies and thrill seekers are everywhere. They drive too fast, seek out crazy adventures (zip lining, sky diving, etc.) and indulge in behaviors that may push the limits of acceptance as a way to wake up their sensations and achieve that dopamine high that is much like a drug euphoria. Some escorts find themselves meeting up in risky situations, taking on clients that pose a threat or risk or engage in unprotected sex to find their highs. They use their encounters as avenues to pleasure and adrenaline. They like almost getting caught by a spouse or tempting fate by engaging in indecent exposure in an elevator or other public place. Indulging in risky behaviors may result in serious problems, including health, safety and freedom concerns. Jail time for illicit and illegal behaviors is possible. Threats of STDS re real. And, some clients will pose threats to personal safety. Avoid making poor choices and save the adrenaline highs for actual activities that are more accepted by society.
Addictions are real and may require more than efforts to avoid triggers or eliminating situations from your life. It’s a very real possibility that if you suffer from an addiction you need to seek professional help or guidance from a 12-step program or something similar.
Going it alone is admirable, but seeking professional help is also something to be proud of. Overcoming an addiction is not easy, but it’s going to provide you with a better, freer, more complete lifestyle.