Today it’s relatively common for people to switch careers midway through their professional lives. Even in days of strong economies, many executives and professionals discover they are unhappy with their careers and inspired by entirely new paths, providing room for creativity and flexibility. Regardless what your reasoning or motivation may be, contemplating a new professional career in the escort industry as a 40-something adult may be exciting and daunting, simultaneously.
Switching gears in the middle of your life to change to any profession is risky and enough to make anyone question his or her sanity. However, considering entering the adult entertainment services industry as a mature escort may sound crazy to many people. But it is really just as viable for a 40-something man or woman to seek an escorting career as it is a younger person.
For an aspiring mature escort, there are 12 keys to success:
- Be your “best self”. As Oprah has advised women over the years, focus on being all of the positive things you think you are. Don’t obsess over the crow’s feet around your eyes, your saggy breasts, your age or the fact you never finished up your grad degree. Let your insecurities go, and focus on the wisdom, experience and confidence you have acquired throughout your life. Exude the comfort you’ve grown to have in who you are, and allow that to shine forth. Avoid dwelling on your weaknesses or fears; they can consume you and direct your path. Emphasize the good things you have to offer, celebrate your maturity and evolve into an escort any client would want to hire.
- Deal with your appearance. Even when you were 20 years old and in the best shape of your life, perhaps, you were dissatisfied with some aspects of your body or your physical looks. Body image issues and negative beauty self-perceptions are difficult things for women to conquer. As a more mature escort, you may feel even more insecure about your imperfections. Find a way to deal with your issues. If your way of dealing with your “laugh lines” is to seek Botox treatments, don’t feel ashamed to go that route. Many professional escorts (even in their 20s) benefit from cosmetic surgery or other procedures intended to enhance their beauty. If you don’t want to (or can’t afford to) go down the artificial assistance path, make efforts to improve your looks through other means such as committing to a healthy lifestyle, exercise and an organic diet to shed pounds, add shine to your hair and enhance skin tone. Many escorts incorporate flattering clothing that camouflage body imperfections and great make-up to accentuate their best features. Simply embracing the wrinkles or a few extra pounds can be empowering, and most clients won’t notice anyways. Whatever decisions you make about your appearance, it’s essential that you become confident and accepting of your looks before embarking on your escorting career.
- Develop realistic expectations about escorting. The media’s portrayal of both gritty and glamorized lifestyles are not entirely true, whichever you choose to believe. Escorting is not necessarily a luxurious career, but it’s also not as degrading as it’s sometimes made out to be. Escorts all have different experiences, and it’s important to know that ahead of time. You must recognize that the escort profession requires hard work, dedication, perseverance and patience. The long hours and unpredictable schedules may create a tough transition for you, especially if you have a family. You will come across unpleasant clients, despite your attempts to weed them out. And, you will face harsh judgment and stigma from society and those close to you, if your secret profession is revealed. While considering these negative aspects of escorting, a potential provider might wonder if it’s really worth it to pursue a career. Most professionals agree that the benefits outweigh the costs, in that they have flexible schedules they can set themselves (in the long run) and earn significantly more money than they could through traditional working environments. But, this is all possible due to hard work and patience. Nothing will be handed to you.
- Time is a limited commodity. Escorts just starting out have plenty of time to build up their client lists and evolve into the escort they want to become. However, a more mature escort should approach her new career with an “all in” attitude. You should set your goals high, aggressively market for clients and strive for quick success. You can afford to be more straight-forward with your marketing efforts, defining who you are and the type of client who will find an encounter with you enjoyable. Don’t hold back when listing your positive traits and attributes. Promoting yourself in the most straight-forward way possible will benefit you highly. And, the clients you are seeking will appreciate your direct approach to them. Most of them have already stereotyped mature escorts as having more confidence and experience; your strong marketing efforts will coincide nicely with their expectations. And, realize that every day that you spend wasting time or allowing your career to move forward in a mediocre fashion is a day that you lose toward profitability.
- Consider joining an agency with established clientele who are looking for mature escorts. Even though the Internet allows you the opportunity to find clients on your own, it may benefit you to collaborate with an agency that has a steady request for encounters with an escort like you. Working as an independent contractor through such an agency reduces the time it will take you to get up and running with a consistent schedule. Through an agency, you may acquire regular clients who can help shape your escorting persona and image even further. It will also provide you with a chance to determine if escorting is the right move for you. After working with an agency for awhile, you can always separate from it to seek independent status. However, if you leave the agency, you will have to market yourself to attract a new list of clients.
- Utilize appropriate descriptors when you are writing your profile information, biography listing or any other content for web marketing. Your language should be truthful and accurate, letting clients know you are not a teenager or young coed. You should always attempt to inform your potential clients clearly about what they can expect from you, avoiding misleading statements or suggestions. However, that does not mean you have to bluntly say that you are 44 years old and have a C-section scar from 20 years ago that never healed. Despite your age, you can still incorporate adjectives like: fiery, spirited, sultry, curvy, feisty and ravishing to describe yourself. You can indicate through your description that you are youthful, fun-loving and enthusiastic, which provides insight for your client that you are going to be exciting during an encounter. Avoid using the terms: older, mature and seasoned. Utilize words that have positive connotations. (And, remember that you don’t have to reveal your true age as long as you don’t deceive clients into thinking you are much younger than you look.)
- Charge the rates you deserve. Many escorts who reach their 40s tend to think they can’t command the premium rates that younger providers can. That is not true. By setting your rates lower, you are undercutting and cheating yourself out of the wages you could be earning. Encounters with “cougars” are highly-sought adventures that clients are willing to pay generously for. They expect to be charged a fee that is reflective of the experience and skill an older escort has to offer. Consider all of your good traits and base your rates on them, instead of your age. Many escorts only have their youth going for them as a selling point, so their rates are somewhat reflective that they are young. However, you have so much more to utilize to attract clients; don’t convince yourself you aren’t worth as much as a younger escort.
- Never act condescendingly to your clients. Even though you may be significantly older than some of your young suitors, resist the urge to talk down to them or comment on their naivety. Many young clients may be inexperienced in life, but suggesting they are too innocent or unknowing can be offensive and insulting. Communicating with your clients in a patronizing manner because you feel they do not know as much about life or people as you do will not encourage repeat business or get you positive reviews. Even if your clients seem a bit wet behind the ears, cherish their youth and allow them to learn at their own paces. They are not seeing you for your life knowledge or mothering. If you must school them on something, teach them about pleasure and intimacy.
- Avoid trying to be something you’re not. If you see that other, younger escorts are marketing themselves as teenage party girls or crazy college coeds, do not attempt to follow suit. That’s not your scene. You can’t compete for the same clients they are working to attract; and, they are not going to fulfill the fantasies of your clients, either. Be proud of your own niche in the industry, and don’t be tempted by other demographics that won’t fit your image. Embrace the persona you have created, and don’t regret what you can’t be. Even if you had started escorting in your 20s, some demographics wouldn’t have fit you then, either.
- Keep an open mind. By the time you’ve reached your 40s, it is likely that you have established your morals and principles, along with many opinions about life. But, when you work as an escort, you have to realize that your opinions and judgments about people and activities must be kept to yourself, because your clients may differ from them greatly. Additionally, many clients may tell you things or ask for services that seem crazy or extremely off-the-wall compared to any experiences you’ve had previously. As an escort, you have to accept them and consider going along with unique propositions. Of course, standing by your personal boundaries is a must. Don’t allow clients to talk you into things you are uncomfortable with.
- Don’t assume that you are immune to the pitfalls that many younger escorts experience. Every escort, despite her age, can become attached to clients, fall victim to scams, contract an STD, fail to screen a violent client out and be the subject of police investigations. Older escorts may be the target of clients attempting to con them into bareback services, just like escorts who are young. You are not more or less likely to incur these difficulties than any other escort, simply because you’ve had more birthdays. Sometimes your age can influence your decisions, but your chances for coming up against obstacles are equal.
- Consider building up savings to help you get by before venturing into the world of escorting full time. The first month or two as an escort may be a bit lean, especially as you build your client list and enhance your marketing. Tweaking your profiles and adjusting your advertising by trial and error may cause some lag time between start-up and success. Having some savings held back to pay bills is extremely helpful and reduces your stress and desperation as you start out as a mature escort. Additionally, think about beginning your marketing efforts before you quit your full-time job, so that you will have income right up until the time you start meeting with clients for encounters.