“You’re being serious right now?” I pause, waiting for her answer but it doesn’t come. “Sophie, I’m with someone. I can’t cheat on him!”
by Sarah Brooke
Previous episodes of A glimpse into the shadows: An insider’s adventures in the world of escorts:
“I know that and I apologize for even asking. I just had to. One of my regulars has been asking me for a long time if I had a sexy friend who would be interested in a threesome. His only stipulation is that the friend must not be a prostitute. He wants a regular girl.”
“Okay, well why don’t you just find someone who isn’t a prostitute? You could find someone online.” I say, knowing full well that I could go on the internet and easily find a non professional girl who is willing to make some extra cash.
“That wouldn’t work. I don’t want to do this with a stranger.”
“That’s fair enough I guess. I couldn’t do it though, I just couldn’t do that to Mike.” I say, shaking my head back and forth.
“I shouldn’t have even asked you about it, it’s just that he keeps asking me and I keep putting him off. I figured that it was about time that I ask and just hear your answer so that I can tell him no.”
“I don’t mind that you asked, really I don’t. I mean, we’ve done worse than that when we were younger. It’s not that I wouldn’t do that with you again it’s just…”
“Mike. Yeah, I understand. Please. Just forgive me for asking.” She says, sounding very sincere.
“There’s nothing to forgive, seriously. It’s all good.” I give her a smile. “How much was he going to pay anyways?”
“Originally he offered five thousand but I said no, plain and simple. Then he started offering seven thousand and I said that I didn’t really know anyone that I thought would be interested but that I’d think about it. When he started offering ten thousand is when I started to really consider asking you.”
“What the fuck… ten thousand dollars? Each?”
“No, not each. Ten thousand dollars split between us.”
“Holy fuck, that is a lot of money.” I say, genuinely surprised by the amount of money this guy is willing to spend to have a threesome with Carmen and one of her friends.
“Hence why I had to ask you. I really wasn’t going to ask but when he offered the ten thousand I knew that I had to ask you and at least give you the opportunity to say no. It’s a lot of money and it would have ate at my conscience if I hadn’t asked you.”
“I’m glad you asked but wow, that’s a lot of money for a couple hours work.” I shake my head from side to side as if to shake out the temptation. “As tempting as it is, I couldn’t do that to Mike.”
“Of course. Please forget that I even asked.”
“Who the hell is this guy anyways?” I ask.
“It’s Chris, the accountant. He’s one of my most loyal regulars.”
“I didn’t think that Chris was even all that rich?” I say, remembering the few times I’d talked to him over the phone while posing as Carmen.
“He’s definitely not my richest client but he’s up there. He has this fantasy about making a good girl do bad things.”
“Is that why he likes you so much, because you look so innocent but in the bedroom you’re anything but?”
“That probably has something to do with it. I’ve been seeing him for over a year, nearly every week. We’ve gotten to know each other quite well. I actually like him, he’s quite sweet.” She says, a small smile spreading across her face.
“Why don’t you find another escort and pretend like she’s a friend of yours. Convince him that she’s not actually an escort, you know?”
“I know it sounds stupid but I don’t want to lie to him. I also don’t want to bring another professional into this.”
“You don’t want to work with another escort?” I ask, somewhat surprised seeing as Sophie is pretty openly bisexual.
“Not really. I dunno. I’d prefer to do it with you if I was going to do it with anyone.”
“I don’t blame you.” I give her a cheeky wink and she bursts out laughing.
“We’ve definitely had some fun together in the past. I’m comfortable with you so it would be some easy cash. Anyways, seriously, forget I ever brought it up.” She starts talking about a project that she’s been working on for school and I do my best to pay attention but my mind can’t help but wander and soon I’m imagining all the things that I could do with that money. I could finally buy a newer car. I could make a big deposit into my savings account. I could go on a vacation. Hell, I could go on a few vacations. I start planning my trip to the Dominican before it occurs to me that Mike should come with me. For a second I’m excited until I realize that I’d be inviting Mike on a vacation funded by my infidelity. My stomach tightens and I can’t believe that I am even thinking about what I’d do with the money. I’m not going to do it, money isn’t everything and Mike doesn’t deserve that kind of shit. I try my hardest to focus on Sophie but it soon becomes apparent that I’m barely following her words.
“Are you thinking about what you’d do with the money?” She says, breaking her own train of thought to call me out of mine.
“Yes. Fuck. I was just planning the vacation that I’d take with the money but then I started thinking that Mike should come with me. That’s when my stomach started to get a bit topsy turvy.”
“Honestly, even though it is a lot of money it’s not worth it to put your relationship at risk. You really like the guy, right?”
“I’d go so far as to say that I love him.” I say, biting my lip.
“Really? That’s awesome. Oh, Sarah! I’m so happy for you. I wish I had never said anything but I just had to ask you. If the tables were turned I would have wanted you to tell me about the offer.”
“I’m glad you told me, don’t get me wrong. It just forces me to contemplate something very tempting but also very dangerous. If I were to do it, there’s no taking that back. Mike might end up being just a fling but he might also be the love of my life.”
“Tell me the truth… if Mike wasn’t in the picture, would you do it?”
I pause for a moment and consider the question. “If Mike wasn’t in the picture I have no idea what I’d do. I might be far more tempted to agree. I mean, it’s only a one time thing right? It’s not that I have anything against escorting I just don’t think I could handle it as a full time thing.”
“I spent nearly a year considering getting into escorting before I finally took the plunge. I completely understand your apprehension, I’ve been there before.”
“What made you decide to get into escorting, anyways?”
“I just couldn’t handle school as well as working nearly full time to put myself through university. I knew I couldn’t do both and what were my options?” She says, shrugging her shoulders.
“You could have stayed at home with your mom and dad.” I joke, knowing full well that her parents are notoriously difficult to be around.
“Yeah right! Good one.” She snorts, ridiculing at the idea of staying with her parents any longer than was absolutely necessary. “To be honest, I’ve always been curious about prostituting. It’s no secret that I like sex but that I’m not the greatest when it comes to long term relationships. Escorting seemed like a really fun and easy way to make money.”
“Do you still think it’s easy, now that you’ve been doing it for awhile?”
“No, not at all. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s not like it’s hard in the conventional sense. You can’t compare what I do to something like construction work but it’s also not exactly easy. I have to be on at all times. If I’m having a bad day, I can’t bring that state of mind to the appointment. I have to separate Sophie’s life and Carmen’s. Carmen is this fun, perky, carefree sex kitten and Sophie is… well, me. I have real life worries and stresses but Carmen has to be this picture of perfection all the time because my clients expect that. I’ve been blessed with regulars who have stuck around for much longer then I ever thought they would stick around for. My success has a lot to do with my ability to put on an act. It’s that way for all escorts. If you start bringing your personal life into your business engagements, you’ll find yourself out of clients fast. It’s not nearly as easy as I thought it would be but it can be fun. There’s a feeling you sometimes get afterwards, where it really sinks in that you just made the equivalent of a full week of work in just an hour. It’s a really good feeling. But on the other hand sometimes you have appointments where you start reconsidering everything afterwards.”
“Because the guy was an asshole?”
“Sometimes but that’s not always the reason. Sometimes it just feels dirty and you wonder what you’re doing and if you’ll regret this at some point in your life. I know that’s just my ultra religious upbringing putting some good ol’ Catholic guilt on me but sometimes it can get to you. It’s not often though.”
“Are you having a hard time right now? After everything that happened recently?”
“Honestly, I thought it’d be a lot worse after that creep. When I’m with my clients once in awhile I’ll have flashbacks and I’m a lot more careful than I was before. I’m always checking if the condom is on now, I feel like I can’t trust myself to know the difference anymore.”
“Soph, I thought you said he used a special numbing lube and that’s why you couldn’t feel anything?”
“Yeah. He did.” She says.
“Then why worry over it so much? Especially when you’ve just been seeing your regulars?”
“It’s not something I’m consciously doing. I can’t help but think about it.”
I reach over and place my hand on top of hers. “It’ll stop though. Eventually you’ll start to trust your clients again.”
“I think you’re right. Crap, look at the time. I am actually meeting with Chris in a little over an hour and I need to shower and get all dolled up. Shall I tell him no or do you want to think about it?”
I look down at my hands for a minute, thinking about the answer I am going to give. I inhale a large gulp of breath. “Let me think about it.”