Just like in real life during a job interview, a blind date or a meeting for work, it’s easy to get off on the wrong foot with someone. Whether your attitude, attire or a verbal gaffe gets you into trouble, you may have created a bad first impression with the person you’ve just met.
When you’re booking an encounter with an escort, establishing a good first impression is important, because it flavors your entire relationship from that point forward. It helps an escort determine whether she wants to schedule time with you or encourage you to look for another provider. Depending on how badly you come across during your first communications or encounter with an escort, it may be difficult (although possible) to correct.
Use these suggestions as you attempt to remedy the issues that caused your escort to think less than positively about you:
- Give your escort some space. Regardless of what your error was that created a bad impression, time and space helps her forget about it. Back off and avoid the urge to contact her immediately about your goof up. By allowing a day or two to pass, your escort can blow off some steam about the incident and may be more receptive to communicating with you. If you came on too strongly (or made an idiot comment at the onset, such as “I can’t wait to bang you”), time may help heal the damage you did. If you react too quickly and attempt to rectify the situation too soon, your actions may be too aggressive and invoke a negative response from your escort. After all, she may not want to hear from you for awhile; so, it’s best to let things lie for a short time.
- Apologize for your blunder. Escorts will respect the fact that you acknowledge your mistake and are willing to say you’re sorry for it. It’s important, though, that you actually admit up to what it is that you did to make a bad impression. Specify the action (or statement, etc.) as you’re attempting to make amends for it. An apology for simply making a bad impression isn’t sufficient. It takes a real man to fess up to his shortcomings, and an escort likes to see that in her clients. If you don’t know exactly what you did, ask about it. Encourage your escort to tell you what you did to put her off. If it’s something that you feel you should apologize for, then administer your atonement. However, if you feel you were not wrong, do not lower yourself to saying you’re sorry. Move on and find a different escort, because you and your current provider simply don’t see eye to eye. Another note about apologies: do not overdo it. Saying you’re sorry too many times, repeatedly, may make her uncomfortable and put her in a position where she feels she must overcompensate with her reassurance that it’s okay. Find a happy medium.
- Drop topics that you find yourself discussing that may be causing trouble. If you are constantly ranting about your ex-wife (or current wife), work colleagues, or other people or situations, stop it. Even though your escort is there for your benefit, she doesn’t want to hear an entire encounter full of rants and raves from you about the drama in your life. It’s one thing to briefly discuss your relationship issues, but it’s another to complain about them incessantly. If you find yourself rambling on about negative conversation topics, steer your conversation into more positive territory. Additionally, if you discover that you rattle on about subjects that are boring or over-detailed, shush yourself. Changing topics to something that both of you can talk about demonstrates that you are interested in including her in your encounter, instead of talking at her like she’s an object. If she sees you making an attempt to talk about positive, inclusive subjects, she will likely forgive any previous transgressions you’ve committed through former conversations.
- Utilize your sense of humor to make up for misgivings. Self deprecating humor, especially, is a great way to laugh off a comment or action that may have caused your escort to bristle. It won’t make her forget what you said or did, but it may help you redeem yourself a bit by demonstrating that you have at least one positive trait: you’re funny. Insult yourself, point out one of your weaknesses or redirect the attention toward something about yourself in a funny way that will take the attention away from your error. In a study published in the academic journal “Evolution and Human Behavior“, psychologists tested graduate-level students with pictures coinciding with funny and non-funny statements, evaluating how men and women viewed each other as a result.
Women preferred humorous men as relationship partners, even when the humor they used was unsophisticated,
the experts reported. Additionally, Match.com reports that humor can overcome certain deal breakers in relationships, thus helping to smooth over a bad first impression.
- Ask for a second chance. Use sincerity as you inform your escort how things will be different if she will allow you another opportunity to prove yourself. Demonstrate how your behavior will be altered, what will change and your expectations about what she will think of you afterward. Provide her with reassurances that if you fail to prove yourself, again, she can block you forever from her client list. Let her know you genuinely want to fix her impression of you, but that you can’t do it without her being open to giving you another break. If she agrees, don’t be pushy about when or where. Let her set up the time and date, along with the parameters of the encounter. She doesn’t have to open herself back up to you, so it’s important to accept the shot she gives you.
- Give an explanation about what created the bad impression. If your background check comes up spotted or with inaccuracies, provide a reasonable excuse about it. (Don’t lie!) If you have an arrest record, but have been rehabilitated for years, inform her about your change. Tell her about your journey that may be disturbing upon first glance, but with further investigation is not really so bad. Fess up to mistakes in your life and describe how you’ve changed. If your bad first impression came from a misunderstanding, attempt to explain what you really meant or intended through your actions. An escort can’t read your mind, and she will probably think the worst, automatically. If you talked to her when you were having a bad day and weren’t yourself, tell her that. Even though some escorts won’t listen to what they consider to be excuses, make an attempt to explain yourself, if you want a chance to build a positive escort/client relationship with her.
- Make it up to her. If you said or did something rude or inconsiderate, you may need to fix it with more than just words. Just as when you are dating or married to someone, flowers, jewelry or other gifts sometimes help to smooth over difficult situations where you were undoubtedly in the wrong. Pick up a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine or a gift card to a store you suspect your escort shops in as a peace offering. While your gift, alone, won’t fix whatever happened to cause your bad first impression, it will provide your escort with the knowledge that you want to repair any damage that you did.
- Focus on your escort. If your gaffe included not paying attention to what your escort said or did, then attempt to remedy the situation by really focusing on her during the next encounter you book. Compliment her appearance, listen to her and ask questions that tell her you are interested in what she has to say. Don’t be too inquisitive or barge into her personal life, but feel free to allow her to talk about topics that are important to her. In addition to allowing her to feel cared for by you, go the extra mile to ensure that she is enjoying the encounter, too. Physically, make sure she is as taken care of by the end of booking as you are. (Unless she rejects your efforts to help her climax.) Emphasizing that you want her to feel happy, too, is a good first step in repairing your image with her.
- Do better the next time. If you’re uncomfortable talking about what an ass you were, then pledge to yourself that you will rectify the situation by being the perfect client next time. You can’t go back for a “do over.” But, you can establish a new pattern of behavior by being considerate, thoughtful, kind and generous. Do not repeat the same mistake, again. Even if you don’t mention that you are striving for improved behavior, your escort will notice. She may mention it, and you should feel free to admit your efforts and hopes for her to reconsider her initial opinion about you.
- Reflect on the situation. If you know you made a bad impression, but you are unsure exactly what you did wrong, revisit the encounter or communication in your head. Review what you said, how you acted, the body language you presented and anything else that could have turned the tables against you. Attempt to see yourself as your escort saw you. Were you pompous? Rude? Condescending? Racist? Generalizing? Did you do something that directly (or indirectly) insulted your escort? Analyze the entire interaction and think of ways you would change how you behaved. Once you see yourself through another view, it’s common to realize that your actions could have been taken negatively. Once you discover this, make efforts to act differently. And, be sure to explain to your escort what happened and how you’ve come to see you need to change.
Establishing a positive relationship with your escort is essential if you want to become a regular. Your first impression has a lasting effect on how your escort sees you. Even if you demonstrate improved behavior, she is apt to remember your negative traits far longer than your good ones, unless you really put out the effort to convince her you’re a better guy than you demonstrated at first.