Escorts and the art of self-invention

Escorts almost never use their real names on the job, both for self-protection and because an assumed identity is the beginning of an intriguing invented self. Escorts have the opportunity to develop new personas, which is rare in the real job world.

by Hannah Jay

This persona is essentially the girl they are when they are escorting. This assumed persona is the basis of her brand and it is also the basis for the experience she offers her clients. It is worth a bit of thought because the right persona can give a girl a tremendous competitive boost.

In a sense, your escort persona can be whatever you want it to be; but practically it is wise to stay close to who you actually are and simply emphasize elements of your own personality. Are you sensual? Is your sexuality erotic or more down to earth? Do you look the girl next door or the an uptown girl? Do you love feminine, lacy lingerie or do you sexy and racy? Love to travel? Would you rather read a book or see a movie? Love getting dressed up? Steak and potatoes or Coquilles St. Jacques à la Provençale? (a luscious appetizer of scallops gratineed with wine, garlic, and herbs).

Take an honest look in the mirror. Slim? Athletic? Curvy? Best body feature? Great legs? Fabulous derriere? Luscious breasts?

Take a close and critical look at your face. Are you a beauty? Model quality? Exotic, pretty, or cute? Great hair? Lovely eyes?

With a bit of artistry and attention to details, you can change your image when you assume your escort persona. Have a bit of fun — remember playing dress-up as a little girl? Here’s your chance to do so as an adult. Skillfully applied make-up and a few curlers can transform the girl-next -door into a smoldering seductress — wear a red leather jacket and a tight black pencil skirt, stockings and stilettos and you are his femme fatale. A slinky, beaded, flapper dress and you become a glamorous Gatsby girl. LBD (little black dress) paired with black, seamed stockings and you’ll be stepping into cocktail land. While you can, in the appropriate circumstances, pull off any of these looks, it is probably best to adopt a single signature look and sensibility.

An escort who is also a savvy business-woman, will develop a persona to appeal to the broadest possible market. This means choosing one that hits the hot buttons with the largest number of men. Words like sexy, playful, erotic, and sensual all give a potential client clues to what he’ll experience with you. So, if you advertise it, you better be able to deliver. And that begins with the first impression he has upon meeting you. Unless your looks match your words, he will be confused and perhaps even disappointed. Therefore, it is essential that your advertising, photographs, and website, are all in sync with the image you are trying to project. When selecting photos, try to have a couple of shots in a sexy secretary vein and perhaps one that is slightly suggestive — naked under a strategically placed sheet in bright daylight. What you are marketing is a fun, easy encounter. Try an ad like this to give a clear idea about your escort persona:

Looking for the Girl-Next-Door?

Hi! My name is Emily and I’m your girl-next-door. I just love giving a man my full attention. I have tanned long legs, a cute bum and long blonde hair. I love being playful and having you play with me.

The natural, casual girl persona can work well for an escort especially if she prefers to see younger men. She is approachable, not intimidating. It also has the virtue of requiring no more than a casual dress or even jeans and a T, a quick shower, a smidgen of mascara and lipgloss, and you’re ready for your date. It’s a great persona for the younger escort since she is not pretending to be anything too different from who she actually is. Think of a user friendly name you can get accustomed to. Katie or Daisy or Molly ­all have the right ring for the girl-next-door.

Generally, the persona an escort picks should be positive even if she is trying to project a more sophisticated mystic. One of the many reasons men visit escorts is to avoid drama. The old joke that a man doesn’t pay an escort to come over, he pays her to leave, is telling. The client knows his experience is finite. No attachments, no complications, no questions, and certainly no pressure or expectation to call her.

Some escorts tailor their strategy and their appearance to appeal to corporate clients. To make this work, an escort must look and, indeed feel, as though she belongs in the jet-set class—accustomed to luxury hotels and fine restaurants, at ease at the glittering parties their clients attend. he look is uber polished, sophisticated, and refined. Dress, hair, nails, make-up, demeanor all exude an aura of elite status, not escort.

If this personna is just not you, and you can’t even act it through convincingly, you can still attract business-class clients by adopting the counterpoint personality; one which evokes the demure, Japanese Geisha. This quiet, gentle persona represents an oasis of pleasure and calm. The Geisha-like escort caters to the businessman’s need for relaxation at the end of a fast-paced and stressful day. This non-challenging encounter also enables him to more easily justify and rationalize hiring an escort and assuage any guilt or conflict by thinking of it in terms he knows well: a transaction: one professional purchasing the services of another professional.

An escort must really be at the top of her game is she wants to break into this executive escort league. This persona requires a great deal of effort on her part, but the rewards are substantial. Most significantly, she is able to charge much higher escorting rates. She earns more in two ways: first, the minimum time commitment per client is one hour; and secondly, her hourly rate is usually about 30% more than the going rate in her city. She is also able to offer more services: travel companion, acting as a date for social functions, and extended encounters such as week-end rendezvous. All other such ideas and delights are up to the imagination, and the bank account, of course.

If you are ready to go after this sort of client, here is a sample ad that you can revise to work for you:

You Deserve the Best

Give yourself the rewards you deserve. Let me discreetly ease your stress. Attractive, well-groomed, impeccably dressed lady will attend to your every need. Discretion expected and assured. Finer Hotels only.

Pure professionalism is the objective. From the look and tone to the advertising campaign, to your web presence and telephone manner, a professional attitude will put these particular clients at ease, and assure them that they are getting what they are paying for. Since the rates are high; so are the expectations. In a service business (and the escort business is indeed one) having a level head for business, an eye for detail, plus a willingness to go the extra mile for client satisfaction will serve an escort well. Money is not the only scorecard for success here. A business class escort aims to leave her client delighted and wanting to see her again. Because once she finds them/they find her, she wants to keep them. She has discovered the magic of regulars.

Alt (alternative) girl is a persona which can work for escorts who have already made irrevocable personal style choices – tattoos, piercings and the like. Alt girl personas are a mixed bag – the gothic, the gypsy, the skater chick – the tribes are too numerous to count. She should not however, not look like a looser, a drunk, a drug-addict, or a homeless person. Your hair can be any shade as long as it is clean and cared for. Ditto for skin and wardrobe. You want to be intriguing and enticing, not scary.

Fortunately, there is a set of men for whom this genre holds an intense and erotic fascination. Clients will project a lot onto a girl who adopts the Alt girl tag. In theory, an Alt girl is more likely to be into (or at least open to) everything from S/M through to corsetry. The question an escort has to answer in creating this persona is what of the theoretical Alt girl traits does she have, and which will she be willing to share. Part of successful escort persona construction is intention. At the outset, an escort is making conscious choices about her presentation to the world, or at least, to another. Adopting an Alt girl persona is very much a decision to engage with the client’s perceptions or fantasies of what Alt girls are all about. It can be more than a little uncomfortable if those perceptions are not, in fact, accurate in the case of every particular escort. Better to set some limits and be very clear from the get-go.

Advertising could run something like this:

Alternative Girl for Encounter

Tats, piercings in interesting places, a lot of edgy makeup. I am a grrrl looking to bring you mystery and intensity. Are you ready? In calls only. I can’t go to hotels.

The Alt girl persona is very deeply challenging. But taking on the Alt girl persona gives the right girl the capacity to escort on her own terms.

At the exact opposite end of the spectrum of the Alt Girl is the Model. Truly beautiful girls, and escorts clever enough to get their pictures done by brilliant photographers, with great stylists, create the image of an unattainable woman who, for a price, will bestow the pleasure of their company on a few fortunate men.

The Model persona is glossy, all about beauty and high style. The notion of arm candy are the bread and butter of the Model escort. She’s appealing to men who need to be with a drop-dead gorgeous girl and are willing to pay for the pleasure.

For an escort, the Model persona is high-maintenance, but also high return. Her calling card is top-notch photography and a runway-worthy wardrobe. Having a professional take your advertising photographs is vital. If possible have a hair and makeup person on the shoot. Full professional fees can run upwards of $1,000 but the resulting beautiful photos will make you stand out wherever you advertise.

Her client is looking for, and paying for a degree of perfection. This means high-impact hair, flawless makeup, and investments in quality shoes and designer bags. If your bank account seems inadequate to the task, the good news is that Model persona clients will often be delighted to go on (or at least finance) shopping expeditions, days at the spa, whatever you want, dahh..ling.

Advertising for the escort who takes on the Model persona is elitist and geared towards well-heeled clients:

When Only the Best Will Do

Gorgeous, 20-something model available for your pleasure. Be swept away by a statuesque, high fashion, blonde with hidden talents. Lets see if you can discover them.

An escort who takes on a Model persona is deliberately narrowing the size of the client pool. She is not seeking the average client. She presents a challenge and only the most confident of men will rise to the occasion.

The last persona, and in many ways the most difficult, is the Courtesan. In many ways creating the courtesan persona takes an escort right out of the real world and into another, more enigmatic one. In actuality, the Courtesan is the mirror image of the average escort. She is selling her beauty, her intelligence and charm, and her impeccable taste to men who appreciate the finer things in life. A persona perfect for the older, but still beautiful escort who has the advantage of experience in life.

Courtesans take the business of paid companionship and elevate it to an art. To fully take on the Courtesan persona, an escort must recognize that while intimacy is certainly a part of the equation, it is the icing rather than the cake. Donning the Courtesan persona requires much more than a few stylish outfits, a good haircut, and retro lingerie. This is a woman with grace as well as style. Although the client base is small and distinguished, an escort can still do very well indeed because the Courtesan persona operates by engaging on a regular basis with a very few, very select clients. She provides an eclectic array of entertainments and enchantments for men refined enough to appreciate them, and her, and possess the means to afford her.

A Model escort might very well choose the Courtesan persona. But an escort does not have to have model-level looks to take this approach. In fact, a Courtesan’s beauty may be idiosyncratic rather than conventional (Sophia Loren was dismissed by many a daft director who told her she wasn’t pretty enough to be an actress); and her body may be more voluptuous than your perfect, twiggy supermodel. Because of this, not despite it, this Courtesan-esque escort is all the more desirable and sought after. Why? Because she has the capacity to engage a refined man at more than a merely superficial level. Education, experience, empathy and poise are all part of the courtesan’s endless allure.

Advertising for an escort reaching for the courtesan persona is unlike typical escort adverts as courtesans focus on longer term intimate arrangements. A courtesan finds business often from acquaintanceship rather than ads, however, at the outset one like this will draw attention:

Elegant Woman Seeking Interesting Man

A glass of champagne, an evening in the company of an elegant, enticing, woman. A taste of sensuality and pleasure is all yours to enjoy.

To manage the courtesan persona, an escort must redefine her entire enterprise. She books a limited number of appointments of longer duration. She may not even take on new clients once she has an established roster of regulars. She learns what each client wants, needs, and enjoys and tries to accommodate them in every way because she is being paid well for her services.

The line between a mistress and a courtesan is often blurred. Both deliver a classic escort service, but perhaps the best way to make the distinction is that a courtesan will have clients, and is, to a controlled degree, “on call”. On the other hand, a mistress confines her business to one man who takes care of her financially and they arrange a fixed or flexible schedule usually a couple of times a week. A mistress relationship may be of short or long-term duration. There are no set rules. And the terms may change as they go along. Love may enter into the equation; or children. It is not unheard of for the mistress to become the wife.

This is just a sample of the range of possible escort personas. Finding or inventing one which works for you is usually one that actually suits who you are and enables you to play up your best features and qualities. Unless you are a wanna-be actress, this will make your life as an escort a great deal easier and ultimately more rewarding, too.