Sometimes, even the best clients get under your skin or do things you have to correct them for. But, when you need to nurture your relationships with these clients for good reviews or continued loyalty, censoring your comments is often required.
Escorts should learn the art of tact for situations like these. Harry S. Truman (former President) once said, “Tact is the ability to step on a man’s toes without messing up the shine on his shoes.” This is precisely what you need to do during some of your problem encounters.
Mendable situations might include: The nicest client could have extremely bad halitosis that is fixable with mouth wash prior to an encounter. The cutest client might have a terrible habit of showing up late. And, many other great clients probably have habits or issues that preclude them from the “perfect client” list.
However, with a little gentle guidance and tact, these clients may learn the error of their ways. Or, at least, you can alter the situation where it’s much more bearable for you. Use these tips for tactful ways of solving problems with your clients:
- Present your limitations as strict policies. When you’re in the business of escorting, it’s perfectly acceptable to have policies. Each and every legitimate business in the world has some sort of policies that help its productivity and organization. Establishing procedure for certain clients is never a bad thing. For instance, if a client arrives at your incall, stinky after a day of hard work, it’s a reasonable policy to establish that clients must shower prior to intimacy. When you entertain a client with chronic halitosis, you can spare his feelings by explaining that you have a policy to not kiss your clients on the mouth or engage in deep French kissing with them. Clients who have funky looking or smelling penises should expect that no hanky panky occurs without a condom on — after all, it’s just common policy! .
- Use your availability (or lack of it). Use your schedule as a shield while explaining why you can’t continue seeing some clients. Sometimes, you don’t care how much you hurt a client’s feelings, especially if he’s been a problem for you the entire time. Others, though, don’t intend to be the bane of your existence, even if they are. These clients need to be eliminated from your client lists, but they don’t deserve an intentional blow to their egos. As a result, you must find a tactful way of suggesting they find another escort. One of the best ways is to explain that your schedule is so busy that they’d have to book far in advance to get an appointment with you. Tell them that you’re paring your client list down and have to refer some clients on to other escorts. Your client may feel a bit dejected, but he won’t feel as though you are singling him out to turn him down. Maybe it will help him feel less miserable when he knows (or thinks) that others are being “let go,” too. Telling him that others are suffering the same fate is a way of saying, “Nothing personal,” without actually saying, “Nothing personal.” Breaking up with a nice client is hard, but doing it with compassion will be the best thing for you and him in the long run.
- Introduce standard reminders as a way to get clients back on track. Many business professionals review policies as a way to gently guide associates into following standard rules or operating procedures. You can do the same with clients. It’s sometimes common for clients and escorts, alike, to get a little relaxed about the rules. However, when you have a client who takes advantage of you regularly, due to loosening things up, you’ve got to point it out.Because you’ve allowed rules to be broken, you may find it difficult to call him out on his behavior. As a result, you can talk about another (fictional) client who has really been bad at not following your policies. You could explain that it was about up-front payment, scheduling or anything else. As a result, you can tell your client that you feel it’s necessary to re-visit all of the original “rules” that you request your clients follow. Make sure you emphasize the one that your client needs to be paying more attention to. If your client does not catch the hint, there’s no shame in parting with him.
- Explain that your client’s behavior is one of your personal pet peeves. Everybody has pet peeves, and they may include innocent actions performed by others. Some people can’t stand when others crack their knuckles or breathe heavy. There are numerous common pet peeves, and many people have uncommon ones. Tell your client that you have a fear of germs, so you make everybody shower when they come to your incall. (This eliminates discussions about a client’s body odor.) Elaborate on your anxiety over late clients and how it causes you undue stress… which a client worth keeping won’t want to be guilty of. Tell your client that you really hate talking extraneously on the phone, and he will catch the hint to cease his constant telephone contact. Make it your issues so it does not look like you attack or criticize your client.
- Take the blame. Some clients do crazy things that you wouldn’t even think to talk about ahead of time. There is no way that you would realize you need to discourage a client from bringing a samurai sword to an encounter. Or, that he can’t undress on your front stoop. Or, that you’d prefer to be paid in paper money instead of coins. Some situations are just unpredictable and uncommon. As a result, you’re left with the dilemma of harshly calling a client out on his behavior or just accepting it. But, you can ease the tension a bit when you take the focus off of him and put it on yourself by taking the blame. Say to your client, “I’m so sorry! I should have told you ahead of time: I only take bills larger than $10s.” And, explain that you’ll take his rolls of quarters this time, but insist that he cash in his coins before bringing them to you next time for convenience. Or, create other “policies” you’ve forgotten to mention on the spot when your client does the unimaginable. Always apologize and encourage him to heed your suggestion next time. But, be sure to not criticize or laugh at his crazy actions this time.
- Make an offer of extra service (at no fee) to correct some actions. For a client who seems resistant to taking a shower ahead of time (and needs to), make it an added-value part of the encounter by bathing him seductively. Or, provide a sexy back rub in lieu of a hand job when you know your client wants you to touch him without a condom. You can provide a complimentary foreplay text as a way to remind a perpetually late client that your encounter with him is 30 minutes away. Think hard about whatever issues your clients have and come up with “services” that can be solutions to the problems. They don’t have to be elaborate things; simplicity goes a long way to fixing even the most bothersome challenges.
- Ask your clients questions about an issue that bothers you. When you more fully understand what is going on in a client’s head, you may not feel the need to address an issue so strongly. It may become easier to understand that a client is always late, because he’s challenged with dropping his daughter off at daycare and she doesn’t want him to leave. Or, it is more palatable that a client is grumpy when you find out he’s taking care of a sick relative, in addition to working full-time. There are a million reasons as to why your clients may behave in inappropriate ways. Getting information about why they do what they do can help you fix the problem. (However, don’t allow clients to exhibit mean, disrespectful or threatening behavior for any reason.)
- Empathize. It’s essential to realize that even the most irritating clients have hearts and feelings. While it’s not your job as an escort to sugar coat everything, it’s not necessary to break a client’s heart as you criticize him or tell him you can’t see him as a client anymore. Escorts have to share some not very nice news with clients sometimes, such as cold, hard facts about their attitudes, hygiene practices or other attributes/characteristics. However, you should exercise an empathetic attitude while you do it. Be nice and do your best to avoid embarrassing or belittling your client. Many escorts focus on something positive before they lower the boom about a negative issues. It helps to make your client feel that you appreciate certain qualities he offers, even when you criticize others. Clients habitually suffer from low self-esteem (often disguised by a massive for-show ego), so it’s essential to embrace their fragile sense of self. Unless it’s completely necessary, avoid being harsh and cruel with a client.
- Be short and sweet. Part of tact means saying something and getting it over with. If you find yourself in a position where you must relay a negative message to a client, find the nicest way you can to deliver the concept. Once finished, don’t continue to discuss it, dragging it on and on. Clearly state what you need to and move on. If your client doesn’t “get it,” you may have to revisit it later. But, for the moment, make your comment and continue on to other things. (Unless, the comment is the end of the communication. Then, close up the discussion and say goodbye.) When you ramble on about a topic, your client will either tune you out or feel even worse about the situation than you intended him to. Also, by being short and sweet with your comment, it leaves you less room to mess it up.
- Stay calm. Regardless of how riled up you are about the issue, resist the urge to display your anger or annoyance as you get your point across. Steel yourself to being cool and steady as you talk to your client about the problem. When you become emotional or display passion in an argument, your client can play off of that to his own disadvantage, twisting your feelings around to his benefit. Also, it leaves you more room to botch the conversation. Stay calm and say clearly what you need to in order to get your point across to your client.
- Don’t wait until the “perfect” moment. In most cases, the issue won’t resolve itself. And, the “perfect” moment rarely comes along. Take the bull by the horns and say what you want to say. If you wait to suggest different behavior from your client, he may accept your hesitation as approval. Or, you may never get a good chance to bring up the issue again. Take advantage of the moment and express your mind.
- Be firm. Some clients just won’t take a hint about their behavior or habits. If you have such an ignorant or unheeding client, you may have to bluntly tell him what you think. Escorts who have these types of clients often find that a frank, direct discussion with them does wonders. However, you must be conscious of avoiding statements that are meant to hurt his feelings or wound him. Be direct and clear about what you mean, provide consequences if your wishes aren’t meant and ask for feedback from your client.
- Forgive and forget. Once you’ve gotten your point across to a client and he abides by your wishes, do your best to clear the slate for future fun during encounters. If you continue your relationship with him by holding a grudge about the issue, your connection with him will suffer. Put the situation behind you and move forward.
- Talk less. Life’s most memorable lessons are learned through observation, not through being mentored. If you want your client to take a shower, take a shower with them. If you want them to know you keep track of time, make a clock an unmistakably prominent object in your room. If you want expensive gifts, make the things around you do the talking: exquisite things will attract exquisite things, and vice versa.
In a world where your clients are often very direct and make personally-injuring comments, it’s hard to stay tactful when their behavior is unacceptable. But, you will benefit from taking the high road and demonstrating your great communication skills to get what you want and need from your clients.
Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.
—Howard W. Newton